Max & Dhrithi’s Wedding
If you’re ever invited to an Indian wedding, go!
Especially if that wedding is in India.
There are no right ways to have a wedding, but the best ones that I’ve been to honor the couple and the community that they have gathered together. And that’s what this was.
It was an honor to be invited to join Max and Dhrithi halfway around the world in Bangalore to bear witness to their love and celebrate with friends and family. The wedding events nearly filled an entire week, including flying in early to buy clothing for each ceremony (India has this whole process dialed). Shopping as a group gave us a chance to meet new people and hear new stories about the bride and groom, as well as give the unwed among us a small taste of the many decisions that a wedding requires.
I left the week with a full heart, feeling so grateful for the opportunity to celebrate with them and excited about supporting and participating in this new chapter together. The following photos are split into the four big events from the week — the haldi, the mehndi, the cocktail party, and the wedding ceremony.
Congratulations again, you two. <3
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(All photos with the Ricoh GRiii + Reflx Lab Mini Flash. I cannot say enough good things about this camera.)
The Haldi Ceremony
"The haldi ceremony is a significant prewedding event and ritual in almost every Indian regional wedding," explains Rumela Sen. "It is celebrated on the wedding day or one day prior to the wedding day and is usually a close-knitted event. The closest family, relatives and friends come together on this auspicious occasion to apply turmeric paste (haldi) on the bride and groom's face and body. Some families also smear chandan (sandalwood powder) with rose water on the bride's face and hands and shower flowers on the couples. The occasion is celebrated with dhol (drum beats), Bollywood songs and endless dancing." [via The Knot]
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As the first of multiple wedding events, the Haldi was a perfect microcosm for the weekend: colorful, joyful, and celebrated at Dhrithi’s family home. It opened us up to the importance of tradition, play, and the weaving together of families as we started our celebration of Max & Dhrithi.
The Mehndi Ceremony
"Mehndi is a form of temporary body art, popular at South Asian weddings, where intricate henna patterns are applied to the body. Occasionally spelled mehendi or mihndi, this temporary tattoo art form derives its name from mehndika in Sanskrit. At a wedding, the mehndi ceremony or party is a pre-wedding event where the application of henna takes place…
The application of mehndi serves several symbolic purposes: It is regarded as a sign of 'suhaag,' implying a blissful married life, and is emblematic of vibrance, fertility and the attraction of positivity. Traditionally, brides would have mehndi applied to their hands and feet a day before their wedding, though in contemporary practice, it is often applied two to four days prior to facilitate the darkest possible stain. This shift doesn't undermine the tradition, as it is purely for aesthetics. With its cooling properties, mehndi is believed to help reduce a bride's stress as she embarks on her new journey, solidifying its importance in South Asian wedding traditions," says Jesse Khaira. [via The Knot]
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Music and dancing welcomed the groom as he made his way into the courtyard, followed by family and friends. Throughout the morning, people had a chance to get henna applied to their bodies (this had a fun side effect of the guys often helping our partners drink since they couldn’t use their hands).
While the haldi was joyous, the mehndi felt like the real beginning of the “party.” More music. More dancing. Higher energy. We were also at the venue where the evening cocktail party would be held, which I’m sure contributed to that.
The Cocktail Ceremony
The night before the wedding, family and friends gathered to share toasts, drink, and dance. Dhrithi’s cousin Prathik and his team put together an impressive stage and sound set up, and I wasn’t the only person who appreciated Max’s all white outfit.
The Wedding Ceremony
For a ceremony that is multi-part and steeped in tradition, it felt surprisingly quick and fluid.
Although I understood very little of what was being said, I loved seeing nearly all members of close family and many friends being woven in at various points (I got a great shoulder workout).
I thought that having the reception before the wedding would somehow take away from things, but the opposite felt true — it was much easier to be present to the rituals at hand having danced the night before.
Overall, this was a beautiful way to close out an amazing week. So much love for Max, Dhrithi, and the many new friends we made.
Here’s to your next chapter!
